Hey
In your honest guy opinion.. What is the chances males brains will move from the penis and go into the one on their shoulders?
~Kitten
Kitten,
I thought I was the one doing the humor here.....the chances are precisely zero. In actuality, it's not a matter of brain location, but of blood flow, and the routing thereof. Part of the time, the brain of a male, held securely beneath his sloping forehead, gets ample blood flow for day-to-day operations. However, when in the proximity of a female, blood starts to be diverted to other regions for other activities. This is when higher brain functions start to diminish. As proximity increases, further parts of the brain start to shut down from lack of blood. Eventually, you're left with nothing but a walking hard-on.
Hey Bradbury~
If your girlfriend asks you to have a threesome and you do it and they pay a lot of attention to each other should you suspect something?
~Mr. R~
Mr. R,
Suspect? No. Worry? Also, no. In the unlikely event such an occurrence should actually happen, enjoy every second of it. Don't let thoughts as to whether or not you are a cover (or "beard") get in the way of a truly magical experience such as this. Let those thoughts cloud your memory of it with doubt later. If you can, take pictures for posterity. Either way, don't say anything negative about the events that would prevent it from happening again.
Got a question?
Ask me, bradbury@loose-slugs.com
Just make sure the subject contains "Ask -Bradbury-"
posted by Big Nick 9:11 PM
Bradbury -
I have recently come into some money, and I want to be responsible with it. Now, I don't want to waste it in stocks, and while municipal bonds seem like a safe enough market, I have decided on what I feel to be a market with much higher potential for growth - breast implants.
So, I'm currently an A-, and I'm thinking about going B+ - C. What say you?
Celia.
Celia,
FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS RIGHT AND GOOD, NO!
As you can tell, I am against breast implants. As the great poet David Allen Coe once said, "Itty-bitty titties is the best there is."
That was from a male point of view.
As far as you are concerned, if you want them, get them. Just don't do it with the idea of pleasing men (not that I'm saying you would, merely that you shouldn't), because not all men like fake breasts. In fact, quite a few don't.
Again, if you want them for your own reasons, whatever they may be, then do it. If you're going to, don't go cheap. Talking with the limited number of people I know with experience in shopping around, the extra couple grand is well worth it. Put it this way: Any doctor who advertises on a billboard should be avoided.
To directly answer your question, go with a mid to high B.
Got a question?
Ask me, bradbury@loose-slugs.com
Just make sure the subject contains "Ask -Bradbury-"
posted by Big Nick 6:32 AM
dear -Bradbury-,
i was just wondering....i have a girlfriend...what is the probability that i will have buttsex?
~emo~
~emo~,
To answer your question directly, the probability is fairly high, perhaps between 75 and 80 percent. But to realize your buttsex potential, you must play your cards right.
It hinges on a lot of things. The main one is, in this proposed buttsex, who do you expect will be giving, and who will be receiving?
If your "girl" friend is either really a man, or enjoys the strap-on arts, the possibility of you waking up in the middle of the night with your man-virginity no longer intact is fairly high.
Now, if you want to be on the giving end of the buttsex, your chances may vary. If she's not too perceptive to the idea of sending your "Easy Rider" up the Hershey highway, there's nothing that a bottle of Southern Comfort and some Vaseline won't cure.....or so I've been told.
Perhaps you should bring it up in a nonchalant manner, by, say watching some anal-intense porn with her and asking what her opinion of that is. If she doesn't seem to like it, mention how much smaller your "endowments" are than the stars of the show. Or, maybe you would be better off not saying you have a little Oscar Meyer.
Good luck.
Got a question?
Ask me, bradbury@loose-slugs.com
Just make sure the subject contains "Ask -Bradbury-"
posted by Big Nick 8:43 PM
OKAY.....
The concept:
People with questions, of whatever form, email them to me.
I respond, with the question, on this board.
Fairly simple, no?
Until this gets rolling, I'll just use my own damn email, and we'll see about getting another one later.
SO....Just drop me a line, bradbury@loose-slugs.com, with your question.
The subject of your message should contain "Ask -Bradbury-" (without the quotes).
If it doesn't, there is a good chance your message will go straight to the trash.
We'll see where [if] this goes.
posted by Big Nick 9:54 PM